Kumon Hyodo/Only Once Summer

My Almighty Haunted House

Backstage Stories

Part 1Part 2Part 3

Kumon	…
	(Please… somehow…)
Class Committee	And that concludes our voting period.
Kumon	–.
Class Committee	Judging by the majority votes, it’s been decided that we’ll be doing the boba booth for this year’s cultural festival.
Kumon	!!!
White Cat	Meow~.
Black Cat	Meow~.
Azami	What the hell, y'all? I don’t have any food left.
White Cat	Meow~.
Azami	Jeez, fine. I’ll pet you. I’ll pet you.
Black Cat	*Purrs*.
Kumon	Sorry for making you wait, Azami~.
Azami	It’s fine.
Kumon	*sighs*…
Azami	What’s with that sigh? Did the baseball club lose the district qualification or something?
Kumon	Don’t say things like that! It might bring bad luck! ‘Sides, they’re doing great!
Azami	What is it, then?
Kumon	I was hoping my class would do a haunted house for this year’s cultural festival, but they decided to do a boba booth instead!
	Here I was convinced the classic haunted house would not lose since the boba craze had calmed down!!
Azami	…Heh.
Kumon	By the way, what will your class do?
Azami	…Not tellin’.
Kumon	Why!? Tell me! Is it a maid cafe or something?
Azami	Nope.
Kumon	Then, what?
Azami	…Haunted house.
Kumon	No fair!!!
Azami	That’s why I didn’t wanna tell you.
Kumon	So lucky… You’ve got to do the haunted house…
Azami	Why do you want to do haunted house that much anyway?
Kumon	Because folk monsters are cool.
Azami	How stupid.
Kumon	What’s with that!?
Azami	We’ve already done that, playing folk monsters.
Kumon	That’s not what I mean! What I wanted to do is produce the folk monsters, not become one of them!
	You see! I’ve also been considering the roles! Like, casting Nakayama as the crow-billed goblin since he has good reflexes, and Shimano as the ogre since he’s big and brawny!
Azami	If that’s so, we have some competent members at the troupe–.
Kumon	…!!! You’re right!!!
Azami	Fuck… Looks like I said something unnecessary.

Kumon	Director! I wanna do a haunted house!
Izumi	Huh…?
Tenma	A haunted house?
Yuki	What are you bringing up out of nowhere?
Azami	That’s way too sudden, y'know.
Izumi	Can you elaborate?
Azami	He wanted to do a haunted house for the cultural festival, but his class ended up doing the boba booth.
Kumon	That’s why I wanna do a haunted house at the dorm for a day!
Izumi	Well, I don’t really mind, but… Who will be the ghosts?
Kumon	I’ll scout them after this! It’s all right! I already have people in mind!
Izumi	(O-Okay, I don’t know how he’ll get the scout done, but…)
Kumon	I’ll leave the full makeup to you, Azami!
Azami	What?
Izumi	(Well, I guess I can just let him be. It sounds fun, anyway.)
Kumon	The first one is…umm…
Misumi	Oof.
Kumon	Oh, here he is!!
Misumi	?
	Look at this, Kumon~. I’ve got sparkling triangles from the crow~.
Kumon	Just as I thought, Sumi-san should be crow-billed goblin!
Misumi	Crow-billed?
Kumon	You see, I’d like you to play the crow-billed goblin at haunted house…
Misumi	Crow-billed goblin? I don’t really understand, but okay~.
Kumon	Hooray!!
Kumon	Be the ogre, Omi-san!!
Omi	Hm?
Kumon	You’re the only one who can play the big and beefy ogre, Omi-san!
Omi	???
Kumon	I want Omi-san to play the one-horned ogre at my upcoming haunted house at the dorm!
Omi	Ogre? Do you really not mind me taking on the role? I’m fine with it, though.
Kumon	Thanks!
Homare	Lingering monsoon… Trailing rompers…
Kumon	Homare-san is the fox spirit!
Homare	…Fox spirit?
	What are you talking about?
Kumon	I’m going to do a haunted house at the dorm soon, so I want you to take on the fox spirit role, Homare-san!
Homare	Hmm… Playing a fox spirit who has lived longer than human beings… That is such an interesting role. I don’t mind doing it.
Kumon	Nice!!
Kumon	I’ve got three people for now… It’d be nice if I can at least scout one more~.
Taichi	Ah, there you are, Kyu-chan! I’ve heard you’ve been looking for people to play ghosts!
Kumon	Do you wanna do it, Taichi-san?
Taichi	Absolutely! There’s no way I’ll miss out such an interesting opportunity!
Kumon	In that case, you’ll be the guardian dog, Taichi-san! You’re like a dog, after all!
Taichi	A d-dog? I’ve never seen a haunted house with a guardian dog in it…
Kumon	Alright! Now that the cast has been decided, I’ll give y'all the instructions!

Izumi	…
	This haunted house turns out better than I expected…
Kazunari	It’s said here we should go from the first floor.
Muku	Oh, the map is taped to the wall.
Tenma	!! Don’t move so suddenly like that!
Muku	So-Sorry!
Yuki	You’re freaking out too much.
Kazunari	Director-chan, watch your step, 'kay? It’s dark here.
Izumi	Thanks.
	*scary sounds*
Tenma	Whoaa!!
Yuki	It’s just a sound effect, duh.
Izumi	We should go here next–.
Tenma	Whoaaa!!!
Kumon	Hehe, it’s a big success!
Azami	For God’s sake, why did I have to do this too…
Izumi	That surprised me…
Muku	I thought my heart would stop beating.
Kazunari	Huh? Kumopi, Azamin, are you not playing the folk monsters?
Kumon	The main highlight of this haunted house is in the lounge! Welcome!
Izumi	I-I wonder what they have there…
Tenma	H-Hey, y'all, go first.
Yuki	Yea yea, okay.
Kazunari	I’m opening the door, then~.
Muku	Wow…the decoration here is so elaborate.
Kazunari	Kumopi wanted to do a haunted house so bad, after all~.
Izumi	Huh? There’s an onigiri here.
Yuki	Looks like an offering to me.
???	“Onigiri, onigiri…”
Izumi	…Who’s that?
	(Hold on. There’s only one person here who will say such a thing…)
Crow-billed Goblin	“I am the Great Goblin, Sankakubo, who rules over Mount Mitsumine!”
One-Horned Ogre	“And I am one of his four biggest subordinates, Hangoki!”
Kumon	So cool!!
Izumi	…
	(T-They even come up with a pose…)
Fox Spirit	Ruffling socks, Mystical fox~…
Tenma	?
Fox Spirit	“My name is Hizuki. I shall feed on your vigor.”
Guardian Dog	“I am a subordinate of Hizuki-sama, Taro Sanjou!”
Kumon	OMG! That’s so sick!!
Izumi	(They’re doing a pose too…)
Tenma	The hell is this…
Kumon	My haunted house is so awesome, isn’t it!?
Yuki	You really call this a haunted house…?
Muku	Ummm, it’s not that scary…
Kazunari	But this just screams Kumopi all over!
Izumi	(Rather than a haunted house… How should I say this… it looks more like a chuunibyou monster house.)
Crow-billed Goblin	“Now, let’s have our usual fight!”
One-Horned Ogre	“I shall take you on first!”
Fox Spirit	“Well, well, I wonder which one of you I should eat first.”
Guardian Dog	“Please let me have at least one of your preys, my Lord!”
Kumon	Y’all are so cool!!! My judgment is right!
Izumi	(Well, at least he’s having fun…)

Nids